On the one hand, he gives very few interviews. He does this to avoid re-reading every time a past that he has worked hard to leave behind. But on the other hand, the man who has flirted with trouble for 20 years (alcohol and drugs, paparazzi and sex videos that ended up on the Internet) is like a rushing stream when he talks.

Colin Farrell is a man full of life and good things to share, and on the day of our interview he’s dressed in light colors, keeps his hair short and in good spirits. The man who was so hounded by photographers that he decided to wear a T-shirt that read “Leave Colin alone!”, a find that was so successful that it was turned into a clothing line, has today managed to reveal an important truth, which has made him even more mature: “Loneliness is more and more essential for me, and I discovered this thanks to the pandemic”.

It was on the solitude of Inishmore Island, the largest island in the Irish Aran Archipelago, that he shot the film which has already won him the Coppa Volpi in Venice and a Golden Globe, and will most likely this month lead to his Oscar win. seen.

The movie “Island Spirits” shows life in a place where, apart from the abundant greenery, there is not much that can be done. There is only one pub and a very closed and fanatical community of residents. In this setting, Padraic (Farrell) is a man who has been caring for his donkey for years, and Colm (Brendan Gleeson) is a lifelong friend who suddenly doesn’t want to see or speak to him anymore.

“I don’t love you anymore”, “I’m not your friend anymore” are phrases that hurt deeply. What do you think about such direct communication?
I think people use “brutally honest” language to justify being cruel and mean. On the other hand, I find that there is a meanness in not communicating the truth of what we hear.

On this path to communicating feelings, where are you yourself?
Even though I’m 46, I’m still learning how to express my thoughts and needs, and that goes for friendships, romantic relationships, and relationships with my two children. I want to be honest and express love, but that doesn’t make things easier, on the contrary.

What is the most important thing you have learned about human relationships?
That very often we forget that the responsibility in a relationship falls 50 percent on us. If we forget this concept this is a serious problem.

Ending a relationship or trying to change it from the inside: which path would you choose?
I’m not a big fan of opposites, right and wrong. We all agree that it is not appropriate to knowingly hurt someone and enjoy the pain caused. But in the meantime I believe that sometimes, if I really make the best choice for myself, it doesn’t necessarily line up with what the people in my life would want.

A very delicate balance…
Very difficult, because basically we all think that the happiness and joy of others depends on us. In fact, you have to know how to endure sadness, to go beyond this scheme. But I think that young people are better able to say some things to each other and remain friends.

For Padraic, his ass is very important. Do you feel the same way about animals?
Animals are honest, they are neither conceptual nor “with 2 standards”. They are simply present in your life, they are natural. I am telling you an incredible story. My brother Eamon’s husband, Steve, had melanoma. When he found out, he realized that his dog had been walking around him for 1 and a half years, sniffing exactly the area of ​​the body where the cancerous mass was found: so the dog smelled the poison of the cancer.

Six months after the diagnosis, the dog contracted the same disease as Steve, melanoma. This shows such a feeling of empathy that prompts animals to react to what happens. They have a very deep way of living in the present, which we humans squander by intellectualizing our lives, due to ego, pride and fear.

Have you ever had an experience similar to Padraic’s where someone violently breaks up with you?
Not in that way, which is terrible, and I don’t think I’ve ever invested my emotions in such a direction. However, we are describing the pain, the pain of isolation, which comes in many forms. I could compare it to the death of my grandparents.

Since we’re talking about isolation, is social media alienating us?
They are taking us away from intimacy and interest in talking. I love conversations, even if sometimes thoughts and feelings lead us to judge too quickly, exchanging ideas with someone who is willing to change their mind is great.

What do you think about replacing conversations with technology?
It is a great impoverishment. Because if it is true that we are all affected by some kind of suffering, it is also true that by talking, we have the opportunity to share joy. And doing this is very nice.